Best way to know if she’s for you

Take her to a Yakiniku restaurant.
If you’re not in Japan, take her to whatever its called in your region.
Or its equivalent. Anyplace you can share a meal.

If you’re wondering what Yakiniku is. It’s Japanese for roasted meat.
It could be at a restaurant or at home.
There is a hot pan in front of you.
At the restaurant, they’ll bring you some slices of meat.
Already spiced and dipped in sauce, all you have to do is roast it to your taste. 
You can order rice or fries to go with it.

If there’s a girl you like, take her to a place like this while its fresh.
She hasn’t completely succumbed to your charms yet.
You’re still feeling eachother out.

It’s the perfect time to know what her default ego pattern is.
Mind you, this is not a test to see if she likes you. I’m assuming she does.
But feelings are not enough, We are testing her ego health.
lets see what she does with power tilted in her favor.

The question we’re asking is; what will she do with the meat?

If she sits back and lets you do all the roasting and serving. You’re dealing with a very selfish ego. She’s all about herself and hers.
These are the ones who have been pampered (in the wrong way).
They’re used to getting served, they shoulder no responsibility. Mind you, there are no good nor bad egos. A lack of balance is what makes anything bad.

If you do decide to pursue this woman further, that’ll be the bottom line of your relationship with her. She’ll shoulder no responsibility in your shared growth. She’ll only be competent in things that concerns her and herself alone.

Like I said. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. It depends on how she executes this ego tendency, and if she makes up for it in other ways.

My verdict: it’s hard to balance selfishness. I’d keep her in a folder that reads “not for keeps” if I were you. (Show yourself dragging will smiths wife into that folder)

Back to the yakiniku restaurant. If she decides to roast for herself alone. Then we have a much more interesting case. It’s not blatant selfishness. If its selfishness at all.

You’re looking at someone who is used to getting things done on their own. They’re self reliant and sufficient. With a lot of underlying trauma. i’d call this the independent archetype.

Roast and serve her a little. if she softens, becomes a little more open to you, maybe starts roasting for you as well. Then There is hope. I’d keep her on my list.

But if she gets uptight, and makes a point about how she doesn’t need you to roast for her. We putting her in the folder; yes, “not for keeps”.
she has made independence her identity.
Everything you do together will be governed by her need to prove to you and everyone that she is in fact independent.

This independent woman archetype, could also sit back once she sees you’re  roasting for her. She might even scold you, for not doing it sooner.

Run for the hills. Don’t even keep her as a friend.
In the hierarchy of sins, entitlement leads.

Finally, for the females who immediately take charge of the table.
They roast for both of you. They ask which parts are your favorite.
if they find a delicious piece, they want you to try it as well.

These are the golden ones. They understand responsibility. their feminine roles are taken seriously.
However, They could be over bearingー
cause they care too much, and that’s okay.
A grown man would know how to put her at ease.
Where necessary, scold her lovingly.

I’d suggest you roast for her a little. If she lights up, and becomes a little more emotional, then you’re dealing with a woman that has so much love to give, but have be starved of it. She’s used to taking care of people but hasn’t really been taken care of.

Do not lead her on if you’re not serious with her. Don’t add to her wounds. Pleasing her would be easy. Just show her that you care.

lets zoom out a little. we’re still on the golden archetype. if she tries to micro manage how you roast and serve her. Then you’re dealing with a mum. not a literal mum. i mean she has the ego of a mum. She wants to be in control of everything. Like I said there are no bad egos. It all depends on what you want, and the possible lack of balance.

Mums are usually overbearing. they want to control everything.
THEY WILL MICRO MANAGE YOUR LIFE.
Most women try to do this, but mums are on steroids.

So… just keep that in mind.

Would i keep her in my life? Yes, If I respect her intelligence. And more importantly if she listens. Like I said, every ego has to compensate for ills in other ways.

Back to the golden archetype again. If you roast for her and she welcomes it, she roasts for you in return, and it becomes a symbiotic dance of serving and being served. Oooh…you hit the jack pot.

She might have being through a lot. But at this point in her life she has achieved balance. She has refined herself to the best version of herself she could ever be. 

Or maybe she’s just loved at home, and have being through nothing. Or didn’t let the things she’s being through affect her. Whatever the case; You hit the jack pot. So long as she’s not significantly deficient In other areas.

There you have it, I hope your girl passes the Yakiniku test. There are other things to check as well. Like how she shares the meat with you.

Does she try to equalize every piece you eat. She wants it split down the middle; 5 piece for you, 5 piece for me kind of vibe.

Run for the hills, don’t even put her in the not for keeps folder. She’s in competition with you. It never ends well. 

I don’t know if you’ve noticed but, companies actually try to destroy their competition.

hahaha